Today My Annie is 4!

5.29.2006

Four years ago today I became a mother. There is nothing in the world that has compared to that moment. There is no one else in the world like Annie. As I was looking through pictures for this blog entry I noticed the enormous smile on her face, over and over again. Annie is a kid who smiles, and it is not a small grin, it is a smile that consumes her and takes you along for the ride. She relishes in every moment of the day. This is the child that rolled over at 3 1/2 weeks, yes, 3 1/2 weeks.
She has been called sassy, independent, confident, beautiful, striking, happy, creative, the terrorist, spunky and a list of names I will not own up to knowing. I often try to think of a word or two to describe her and I can't, she is just Annie.
Because she is my first child I am constantly amazed at what she is capable of. She has always been a keen observer of things and feelings and will tell you exactly how she feels. She loves books and stories and songs and dancing. She is silly and serious.
Mostly what she has been is a teacher. She has led me down this wonderful, frustrating and joyous path of motherhood and shown such patience with me. She stuck around while I fumbled with keeping her swaddled and her first baths. She often knew when she had pushed me just enough and then relented. She always rewarded me with smiles, giggles and snuggles, the best rewards and that first murmur of "mama" was a gift from the wisest of teachers. From Annie I have learned patience, independence, willfullness and strength. I have experienced pain, physical and emotional, sadness and heartbreak. She has brought me more joy, compasssion, pleasure and happiness than any one person deserves. Mostly though, she has taught me love, that unconditional love I always heard of in religion class. The love that is benevolent and all consuming. The love that takes away the pain, turns the sadness to joy, and heals the broken heart. The love that makes you cry because they got their first real bicycle or want to tell the world that they call grasshoppers hopgrassers. Four years ago today Annie was born and gave me the most precious gift, the gift of a mother's love. Happy birthday to my little slice of heaven and please stop growing up.